The Clash had it right when they belted out, ‘Should I Stay or Should I Go?’ It’s a decision that’s not always easy to reach. Making up your mind about a relationship that’s been thrown into serious doubt can mean that you find yourself weighing up the pros and cons in an attempt to work out what to do. So, are you sticking with it for the perks or is there more going on?
Better a bad relationship than no relationship at all
We might not like to admit it, but many of us are frightened of being alone. We continue to be with someone who we’re not truly committed to or who isn’t treating us well, simply because it means there’s always a person to call on a dull, lonely or cold night. It’s crucial to be brave and honest with yourself. Your partner should be someone you’re keen to talk the majority of the time – whether you’ve just heard the best news of your life or you’re feeling down in the dumps.
He/she lives just down the street
It’s surprisingly easy to get trapped in a relationship just because it’s convenient. It’s a Friday night; you’re exhausted after a long week at work; you don’t want to spend the evening by yourself but you also don’t feel like going through the rigmarole of getting dressed up and heading out to the pub or club. So you find yourself dating the boy/girl next door (or nearly as close by). But, really, the person you love should be someone that you’re willing to travel across the city for – even if that means braving the rain in bus shelters or paying stupid amounts on taxi fares.
He/she is good looking, rich, etc.
Finally, it’s good to assess why you’re interested in someone. Are you flattered by their attention, purely because they’re good looking, wealthy or charming? Are these factors blinding you to their real character? Attraction is vital, of course, but a great relationship is also about trust and mutual compatibility.
If anything here has got you wondering, consider a re-consideration. If your relationship is all about the perks, it might be time to shirk it!
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